Life never turns out as you plan


That is my son Ian. He’s 5 seriously almost as tall as me & he’ll be starting kindergarden in August. He is my sunshine & he’s autistic. We found out not too long ago & our whole world was turned upside down. He started pre-k when he was 4 at a place called Hickory Grove & a few days into the program his teacher comes up to me one day while I’m picking him up. She says she thinks that Ian is a little different than the other kids. I told her that he’d been home w/ me since the day he was born, I’m a stay at home mom, & he just wasn’t used the other kids or the environment. Well we let things go for awhile & then about a month into the pre-k program his teacher approached me again. She said that he wasn’t adjusting as well as the other kids & he was a little behind. I immediatley got pissed off b/c I was still believing the fact that he wasn’t used to things yet & she wasn’t giving him proper time to adjust. I mean really it had only been a month. So anyhow the teacher suggusted we get him evaluated so we did through Child Find. After the evaluation we were convinced that nothing was wrong, they ladies who did the eval found nothing abnormal. A great weight was lifted off my chest, my baby was fine! He continued going to Hickory Grove for a few more weeks until things started getting bad. He was using bad language & he was getting violent. I took him out of school & he was back home w/ me. He showed none of that behavior being home w/ me.After a few long months we had to go for another eval at a place called Lighthouse. This school saved my sanity & molded my Ian into a great kid :). It was a long drawn out thing, the eval. When it was all done we had to wait an hour so they could discuss Ians results. Our hour was up & it was a very long hour. When we went back to discuss it all they told us he was developmentally delayed, he quailfied for the McCay scholership & he could enroll there in a special ESE program. I wasn’t sure what being developmentally delayed  meant so I was assuming the worst. When they explained it to us I understood a little better but my heart was broken. Developmentally delayed basically means that he learns slower & his motor skills were lacking. Okay so anyhow after all of that we enrolled Ian at Lighthouse for pre-k. Things eventually became great for him there & I was grateful to his teacher. During his time there he had 2 more evals. After the first one his school pshycologist called & said that Ian was showing some signs of autism. I said okay we talked a little more & after I hung up w/ her I broke down. My world came crashing down & my life as I knew it was ending. During the phone call she said the main reasons they were concerned was b/c of his ecohlic behavior, which means he repeats things anyone says rather than answering them & instead of making up hus own answer he repeated things his classmates said when he was asked a question about something. He also has a deep obsession w/ cars, he would line them up, this he still does, instead of imaginary play w/ them. If he lined them up in a precise order & anyone if messed it up in any way he freaked out. He hates loud noises & covers his ears & he’s very complusive! Plus he has no sense of danger. He doesn’t understand that things will hurt him. After everything was done & he had his second evaluation he was unoffically diagnosed w/ ASD (autism spectrum disorder). It took us awhile to except it & I blamed myself & thought maybe if I would have done something different he wouldn’t be like this but I did everything a mother could. I look at my son & he’s the same child, he’s my Ian the same Ian he’s been since forever. I went through it w/ my family b/c no one understood. My husbands family is on board w/ us, they’ve done research like my husband & I so they understand Ian better & why he does the things he does. My dad on the other hand still doesn’t understand & when I try to talk to him & help him understand he gets annoyed. My husband accepts it but he’s afraid to talk about it or tell someone our son is autistic. It isn’t a bad thing! Ian just sees the world in a different way & I think the way he sees it is beautiful. I’ll tell the whole world right now that I have an autistic son. He’s a beautiful, sweet very intelligent & loving child. His stubborness deffinatly makes things a little more difficult & his tantrums are the WORST but I’m blessed no doubt! God just made him a little more special. Everything happens for a reason & anyhow I got this :).